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A southeast Florida laid back beach bum and volunteer bikini assessor who lives on island time.
Recruiting a soldier . . .
I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military.
They've got the whole thing backwards!
Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.
Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' Were bad-tempered and impatient, and maybe letting us kill some ugly bastid that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.....
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell!
Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-****.
If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.
Boot camp would be easier for old guys, . . . .
We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.
They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any push-ups after completing basic training.
Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too . . . . I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave or to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.
These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
Let us old guys track down those terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million hacked off old farts with bad attitudes, automatic weapons, and who know their best years are already behind them.
HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50, . . . in menopause!
You think MEN have attitudes? Ohhhhhhhh my god!!!
If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!
:USA
They've got the whole thing backwards!
Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.
Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' Were bad-tempered and impatient, and maybe letting us kill some ugly bastid that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.....
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell!
Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-****.
If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.
Boot camp would be easier for old guys, . . . .
We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.
They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any push-ups after completing basic training.
Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too . . . . I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave or to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.
These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
Let us old guys track down those terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million hacked off old farts with bad attitudes, automatic weapons, and who know their best years are already behind them.
HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50, . . . in menopause!
You think MEN have attitudes? Ohhhhhhhh my god!!!
If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!
:USA
A southeast Florida laid back beach bum and volunteer bikini assessor who lives on island time.
Replies
More email spam?
A least credit the authorship with a citation or itlaics rather presenting it without and alluding to yours. :wink
"Well Gary, the easiest way to look tall is to stand in a room full of short people." - Curtis Bostick
"All these forums, with barely any activity, are like a neglected old cemetery that no one visits anymore."- anonymouse
Maybe he didn't want to post a link from another site.
I laughed out loud. That was funnier than my OP.
As most of you know, I post many many humorous stories on this site and this is the first time for that sort of comment.
Can you imagine someone with nothing better to do than researching to find something negative
to say about a simple popular humorous essay?
Pathetic actually. He must be a real joy to be around.
Too, another glimpse at the results of his religious learning it appears, that had not yet been exposed.
:rotflmao
A southeast Florida laid back beach bum and volunteer bikini assessor who lives on island time.
Check For Plagiarism
To use this plagiarism checker, please copy and paste your content in the box below, and then click on the big green button that says “Check for plagiarism!” then sit back and watch as your article is scanned for duplicated content.
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HaHa!
He'll be so busy with that website that he won't have time to post here.
I agree. It is. It's not like there is a dearth (look it up) of original material to begin a thread on and yeah I saw it many times and many places before you repeated it here.
There was a time when you needed to be smart enough to build your own machine and figure out what the internets was.
Now it's an appliance . Welcome to the toaster version.
"Well Gary, the easiest way to look tall is to stand in a room full of short people." - Curtis Bostick
"All these forums, with barely any activity, are like a neglected old cemetery that no one visits anymore."- anonymouse
You again made me smile and laugh with your "condescending lecture."
CAUTION: I will match my education (starting with a BSBA, 1966, Computer Systems Analysis), knowledge and experiences about this subject with you any day.
First off, "Internet" is usually regarded as a proper noun and capitalized.
http://www.webopedia.com/TERM/I/Internet.html
:Spittingcoffee
A southeast Florida laid back beach bum and volunteer bikini assessor who lives on island time.
Please credit your cutting and pasting commentary to the original author where and when possible, thanks.
"Well Gary, the easiest way to look tall is to stand in a room full of short people." - Curtis Bostick
"All these forums, with barely any activity, are like a neglected old cemetery that no one visits anymore."- anonymouse
Too bad you tucked in your tail and ran away so quickly.
:rotflmao
A southeast Florida laid back beach bum and volunteer bikini assessor who lives on island time.
"Well Gary, the easiest way to look tall is to stand in a room full of short people." - Curtis Bostick
"All these forums, with barely any activity, are like a neglected old cemetery that no one visits anymore."- anonymouse