I got robbed today.



  • MRichardsonMRichardson Posts: 7,585 Admiral
    LOL. I think when it really goes down
    you'll just poop in your pants.
  • Papi SwiftPapi Swift Posts: 41 Deckhand
    Beastie wrote: »
    They will serve a small amount of time.
    When they get out they are coming to get you.

    That's exactly what I was thinking.

    That's how it goes down on the street.
  • That's what she saidThat's what she said Posts: 749 Officer
    tankard wrote: »
    And this whole time I thought it "crapping your pants" was just a figure of speech.

    Where do you think the expression "scared ****less" came from?
    Phishbohn wrote: »
    It's adrenaline that excite peristaltic movement, Same thing happens to burglars and they take a dump on your carpet or pillow after robbing your house.

    Ex-Con With 'Nervous Colon' Robs Bank After Pooping In Parking Lot

    A Connecticut man with a drug addiction and a spastic colon allegedly defecated in the parking lot of a New Milford bank before robbing the establishment. The man's wife and kids were with him and sat in the getaway car, police said.

    Russell Mace, 55, was arraigned in Bantam Superior Court Monday, charged with first-degree robbery, third-degree larceny and two counts of impairing the morals of a child. Judge Richard Marino set Mace's bond at $100,000 and ordered him to appear in court again on Jan. 4.

    Mace's charges stem from a bizarre bank robbery that occurred on the afternoon of Dec. 16 at the Union Savings Bank on East Street in New Milford. While the robbery itself was par for the course, police said that Mace's alleged activities prior to the heist were far from normal.

    Minutes before the robbery, a female witness saw Mace exiting a white Toyota Camry that was in the bank parking lot. Afterward, he squatted down and began "pooping," the witness said according to the arrest affidavit.

    "The customer told me that the man was going to the bathroom and [said] 'he's not doing what you think he’s doing,'" the teller told police. "The customer said he's doing a number 2, and he's not being discreet."

    After allegedly finishing the bowel movement, Mace, dressed in a hooded sweatshirt and sweatpants, headed for the bank entrance.

    "Before they had any time to react to what was occurring outside, the accused robber entered the bank and demanded money," Ash said.

    Mace, whom a male teller later described as "sweating" and "nervous," allegedly put his hand in his pocket and said: "This is a robbery. Give me all your money. Don't include any singles ... and don't do anything stupid."

    The pooping bandit was given more than $3,000 in cash. Money in hand, he exited the bank and got into his waiting getaway vehicle, where his wife and two children, ages 1 and 4, were waiting, police said.

    It did not take long for investigators to come up with a suspect in the case.

    "He was identified by bank surveillance images," Ash said.

    According to the News Times of Danbury, Russell Mace suffers from "nervous bowels." The newspaper also said he has a prior criminal record in Connecticut. Mace reportedly served time in a federal prison for a 1989 bank robbery.

    Erin Mace told police she didn't know her husband had planned to rob the bank. "I thought Russell might have had to cash a check," she told police. She said it was not until he got in the car and pulled out a handful of cash that she was aware of what he had done.

    "At this point, I had a pretty good idea that he robbed the bank," she told police.
  • coldaircoldair Posts: 11,498 Officer
    LOL. I think when it really goes down
    you'll just poop in your pants.

    are you the voice of experience?
  • PolarPolar Lake WorthPosts: 22,406 AG
    James243 wrote: »
    I have recently considered this type of scenerio and what I would do. My gun is usually stored in the car rather than on my person. If I have the opportunity, I'm hosing them down with gasoline. After that they can shoot me if they want, I think the burning will hurt more.

    you should try carrying it on yourself instead of another person
  • MRichardsonMRichardson Posts: 7,585 Admiral
    coldair wrote: »
    are you the voice of experience?

    No. More like the voice of reality.
  • coldaircoldair Posts: 11,498 Officer
    not everybody reacts the same. first time I got shot I didn't even realize it till my sneaker filled up with blood. when I got stabbed I just watched the blood shoot out of my arm and spun around and ran.
  • MRichardsonMRichardson Posts: 7,585 Admiral
    When I got shot I got up and chased down
    my attacker and beat the hell out of him until
    someone pulled me off.
  • Bruce SBruce S Posts: 426 Deckhand
    I think the crapping of ones pants could be used as a crime deterent.

    If it's timed properly.

    Might work for traffic tickets too.
  • copout@castaways[email protected] Posts: 5,779 Admiral
    I just shipped my pants!
  • coldaircoldair Posts: 11,498 Officer
    When I got shot I got up and chased down
    my attacker and beat the hell out of him until
    someone pulled me off.

    I didn't think running at someone with a real ak47 with a snail drum while he was shooting at me would be prudent, but you are amazing
  • MRichardsonMRichardson Posts: 7,585 Admiral
    I know, thanks!
    My guy had a pump.
  • BeastieBeastie Bokeelia, FLPosts: 873 Officer
    Papi Swift wrote: »
    That's exactly what I was thinking.

    That's how it goes down on the street.

    Perps can smell fear but extreme poosified cowardice really turns them on.
  • RockhaulersRockhaulers Posts: 250 Officer
    Only a minority would rob a cripple at a gas station for 10 bucks....sad.
  • Pescatoral PursuitPescatoral Pursuit Posts: 5,065 Admiral
    Most importantly for the guys with the CWPs...... Frangibles. You can't forget about the downrange innocents.

    Frangible ammo is crap. The only exception may be using it in your home.

    +P with the lightest hollow point in your caliber is what you should be carrying. In the winter time, for better penetration through heavy clothing, up the bullet weight.

    Just making eye contact with would be's seems to be enough of a deterrant. Its no fun if you see them coming- it may give you time to react...
    greggl wrote: »
    Strive for self-sacrificial levels of empathy and sympathy. We are only set free by becoming the scapegoat, or sin eater', rather than picking a target and 'throwing stones.'
    nuevowavo wrote:
    Think you're pretty clever? Think again. Time for a break.
  • PopeyePopeye Posts: 14,296 AG
    You should have smacked him with your purse.
    When I was younger, I could remember anything...

    whether it had happened or not.

    Mark Twain
  • LitiGATORLitiGATOR Posts: 819 Officer
    I am willing to give up $10 if they are off the streets.

    You're a true martyr, or should I say "shartyr."
  • PhishbohnPhishbohn Posts: 2,978 Captain
    What's up Liti... how's tricks?
    Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face. - Mike Tyson.
  • BigDanSBigDanS Posts: 832 Officer
    The OP did exactly the right thing is his original situation and survived the encounter.

    Everyone that tells him what he should have done is out of line because they were not there at the time.

    IMHO the most important item listed is situational awareness. If there is anything to be learned from this it is as follows:

    A - Always carry as often as possible. It is difficult to defend yourself if you do not have the means to do so.

    B - Be situationally aware. Whenever you are exchanging money for goods, or receiving money for an ATM is a prime time for a robbery. I had friends robbed on their front porch while playing a $0.25 poker game.

    C - Comply if overtaken. Nothing you own is worth a bullet

    D - Distance is your friend and defend yourself if possible until the threat is neutralized. If someone has a gun or knife and attempts to rob you it should be an instant trigger that your life is in danger. In Florida you have the right to stop that threat.

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  • Papi SwiftPapi Swift Posts: 41 Deckhand
    LOL....this place always delivers.
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