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Dinner tonight going to be tough

ParkerboyParkerboy Posts: 7,048 Admiral
My wife and I have had dinner with two other couples between Christmas snd New Years every year for the last 15 years. We have gone to the same steakhouse and reserved the same table every year. Well, one of our group had a massive stroke and passed away in June. We have decided to tilt his chair in the reserved position and place a Crown and water at his place for him as he always started and finished dinner with this.

A great guy with tremondous stories told and he will be missed. His widow is coming into town for the dinner and will stay with my wife and me tonight. She said he would want her to attend.

Have mixed emotions about this.
Deo Vindice

Replies

  • AC ManAC Man Posts: 6,372 Admiral
    Is the widow going to be ok with the tribute? Or will it be a distraction and remind her of her late husband thru out the night? People all react different in those situations. Sorry, I'm sure it will be hard either eay
  • CyclistCyclist Posts: 23,346 AG
    I hope you have a nice dinner. Sounds like y'all have a good attitude. It may not be easy at first, but you will not regret an evening in the memory of your friend.

    My mom is 91 and lost the last of her close friends this year. She is the only one left of a dozen or so. So you guys are fortunate that you can meet in memory of your friend.

    Cheers!
  • ParkerboyParkerboy Posts: 7,048 Admiral
    The widow is aware of the plan with the drink and chair and says her husband would appreciate it and I agree.
    Deo Vindice
  • Soda PopinskiSoda Popinski GrovelandPosts: 13,290 AG
    Sorry man. It's hard to carry on sometimes when this stuff happens.
    Like is like a Helicopter.  I do not know how to operate a Helicopter  
  • GardawgGardawg Posts: 9,810 Admiral
    Hope you have an evening filled with good memories.

    It'll be fine.
    “Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.

    Heres Tom with the Weather.”
  • LMKLMK Posts: 591 Officer
    Sorry for your loss. Good friends are one of the best joys life has to offer. Hope you have a special time there celebrating a friend and life.
  • GrizGriz Palm Beach Gardens, FloridaPosts: 9,904 Admin
    Very nice gesture. He would be proud.
    The early bird may get the worm, but the Second Mouse gets the cheese. SW

    :Griz
  • Sorry for your loss.
    Seems to me that you are doing a good thing.
    THERE SHOULD BE NO COMMERCIAL FISHING ALLOWED FOR ANY SPECIES THAT IS CONSIDERED OVERFISHED.
  • smooth movesmooth move Posts: 478 Deckhand
    i think he would approve. i would.
    le se' bon ton roulet
  • HubcapHubcap Posts: 35 Greenhorn
    That's a wonderful tribute to an old friend.
  • Mango ManMango Man Posts: 11,500 AG
    What greater way yo pay homage to your friend. He would be honored.

    Sent from my SM-G920T using Tapatalk


    America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves.
    Abraham Lincoln
  • Gary SGary S Posts: 2,259 Captain
    I think it is great and very healthy for the widow. You should feel proud that she is able to feel close enough to you and your group to move ahead with her life with you and your friends.
  • lakemanlakeman Posts: 790 Officer
    Maybe I'm callous, and I know it is hard for some people to lose the ones they love or great friends. I have lost most of my true friends and making new friends gets harder as you age, but a passing of a person is normal. I try to move on and not hold on to the past where it can be very emotional being reminded of what was. Memories will always be on special days.
  • Flats2blueFlats2blue Posts: 278 Deckhand
    Faith, Family, Friends are what get you through tough times. I would expect the widow to appreciate that the friends will continue with the tradition of the dinner and the sharing of the friendship.

    I just did the first family Christmas without my wife, who passed away in July after a long battle with pancreatic cancer. I can tell you it was tough, but having our daughters and their families here made the traditional Christmas dinner a bit easier. Cherish the times you have, be thankful for the memories, and keep moving forward.

    Wishing you and the others a wonderful evening, sounds like you have the right plan.

    Mark
  • ParkerboyParkerboy Posts: 7,048 Admiral
    Dinner went extremely well, lot laughing and telling stories of his life. His wife then came and spent the night at our house and she told us how much he enjoyed these annual dinners since his retirement. We made reservations for next year, same restaurant, same time so the dinners will continue.
    Deo Vindice
  • mplspugmplspug Palmetto FloridaPosts: 12,595 AG
    lakeman wrote: »
    Maybe I'm callous, and I know it is hard for some people to lose the ones they love or great friends. I have lost most of my true friends and making new friends gets harder as you age, but a passing of a person is normal. I try to move on and not hold on to the past where it can be very emotional being reminded of what was. Memories will always be on special days.

    Everyone deals with death in their own way. I can be smiling thinking about a memory one minute and the next minute I am sobbing uncontrollably.
    Parkerboy wrote: »
    Dinner went extremely well, lot laughing and telling stories of his life. His wife then came and spent the night at our house and she told us how much he enjoyed these annual dinners since his retirement. We made reservations for next year, same restaurant, same time so the dinners will continue.

    Sounds like a great night and I am sure your friend would be happy knowing that it continues.

    Captain Todd Approves

  • SloughSlough S.w. Ga./ St. JamesPosts: 5,351 Admiral
    Glad it all went well
    I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you
  • conchydongconchydong Pompano BeachPosts: 7,078 Admiral
    Parkerboy wrote: »
    Dinner went extremely well, lot laughing and telling stories of his life. His wife then came and spent the night at our house and she told us how much he enjoyed these annual dinners since his retirement. We made reservations for next year, same restaurant, same time so the dinners will continue.

    That is a great continuance of his memory. Hope it lasts for many years to come.

    “Everyone behaves badly--given the chance.”
    ― Ernest Hemingway

  • Mango ManMango Man Posts: 11,500 AG
    Flats2blue wrote: »
    Faith, Family, Friends are what get you through tough times. I would expect the widow to appreciate that the friends will continue with the tradition of the dinner and the sharing of the friendship.

    I just did the first family Christmas without my wife, who passed away in July after a long battle with pancreatic cancer. I can tell you it was tough, but having our daughters and their families here made the traditional Christmas dinner a bit easier. Cherish the times you have, be thankful for the memories, and keep moving forward.

    Wishing you and the others a wonderful evening, sounds like you have the right plan.

    Mark
    Sorry to hear of your wife passing Mark.

    I think your thoughts are spot on...



    Sent from my SM-G920T using Tapatalk


    America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves.
    Abraham Lincoln
  • restlessnativerestlessnative Posts: 2,375 Captain
    Glad it went well and I agree with plug. My friends and I started a fishing tournament a decade ago in my brothers honor. I am somewhat self deprecating or sheepish about it as I really don't like the focus. Since we have started it we have had to unfortunately add my dad and grandfathers name to it, but I've grown as a person along with it. For someone in their 20s it's a lot. My best advice is see how she handles it and it seems like she enjoyed your tru friendship which is awesome. Good on you, but if it gets uncomfortable for some reason respect that too.
  • Keep on SpoolinKeep on Spoolin Posts: 1,361 Officer
    Griz wrote: »
    Very nice gesture. He would be proud.

    I agree.
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