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  1. #51
    Senior Member greggl's Avatar
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    To each his own, but I have too much respect and hope for my daughter, to relegate her to that future.

  2. #52
    Senior Member HialeahAngler's Avatar
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    sometimes I do it for 6-8 hrs at a time.

  3. #53
    Senior Member rrbgtt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greggl View Post
    To each his own, but I have too much respect and hope for my daughter, to relegate her to that future.
    Do you really believe I don't respect my wife? There is no one on God's earth that has more of my respect and admiration; not to mention my love.

    There is no greater task than raising your children

  4. #54
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    My wife and I worked (still do) opposite shifts. I worked nights so I had the kids more and spent a lot of time at school volunteering. It was tiring but I enjoyed it until they hit middle school. It was still fun but as they and their friends got older my tolerance level for stupidity decreased exponentially. My kids did a lot of stuff a mom wouldn't do like fishing, camping, kayaking, golfing, and hitting theme parks ( cypress gardens) and traveling because I couldn't stand being in the house for a full day. Their mom still was involved and did the mom stuff in the evenings so it worked. She has some regrets about missing that time when they were in pre-school and the lower grades doing mom stuff.

    I think a woman would hold missing her kids childhood against the man later on if he was a pure stay at home dad.
    "The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function." F. Scott Fitzgerald

  5. #55
    Senior Member greggl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rrbgtt View Post
    Do you really believe I don't respect my wife? There is no one on God's earth that has more of my respect and admiration; not to mention my love.
    Not that my opinion in any way matters, but I'm sure that you do respect her.

    I just find your description of role definition to be a bit outdated, as an example to your kids.

    Got 4 boys or any girls in the mix?

    Is your ideal that they marry into a mirror of your life?

  6. #56
    Senior Member rrbgtt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greggl View Post
    Not that my opinion in any way matters, but I'm sure that you do respect her.

    I just find your description of role definition to be a bit outdated, as an example to your kids.

    Got 4 boys or any girls in the mix?

    Is your ideal that they marry into a mirror of your life?
    I have 3 girls and 1 boy. I would love to see my daughters become the mirror image of their Mother; who at age 40 went back to college and got her teaching degree (4.0) then continued on to get her Masters (4.0) and intends to get her doctorate. She is currently a very happy, underpaid algebra/geometry/trig/calc/ teacher at a private Christian school.

  7. #57
    Senior Member Go Mongo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greggl View Post
    To each his own, but I have too much respect and hope for my daughter, to relegate her to that future.
    You are way off base.

    We have both sons and a daughter. Both my sons and my daughter will do whatever they want in life. No different than my wife and myself. Whether doctors, lawyers, artists, stay at home parents, etc...

    This is not about a lack of respect for anyone.

    That is like saying I have too much respect and hope for my sons to regulate their future to the pussification of American men. I would never say that, because that would be wrong and insulting to the stay at home dads.
    “Every day is a new day. It is better to be lucky. But I would rather be exact. Then when luck comes you are ready.”
    ― Ernest Hemingway, The Old Man and the Sea

  8. #58
    Senior Member That's what she said's Avatar
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    If I remember, Rusty's wife has her Master's degree and teaches now that the kids are older. From what he has written, I think she's still holding down the house.

    The traditional roles are not for me, but I respect each family to make their own choices. If Dad wants to bring home the money and Mom wants to tend to the house and kids, more power to 'em. I don't think that those roles are exclusive to gender either. What I don't get is where the working parent doesn't help at all when he or she is home.

    When my kids were little and I was home, my spouse gladly changed diapers, helped with bath and bed time and generally helped out wherever needed. Why is the working parent off when they are home but the stay at home parent is still working?

    *edit - Rusty beat me to it.
    Last edited by That's what she said; 01-03-2013 at 05:02 PM.

  9. #59
    Senior Member jad1097's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rrbgtt View Post
    No, it just takes living within the means of one income.

    Actually if you deduct childcare, transportation costs, clothing, and food from the second income; it's often better for the wife to stay at home.
    I agree. I was home for a year or two she was for about eight. The kids can pretty much take care of themselves now being teenagers.


    My wife would not have traveled like that even if her income tripled.

    Traveling sucked for me. I hated being away from the family. The weekends I was home were sleepless. As soon as the kids are out of the house I think I am going to develop a serious "have tools, willing to travel" attitude.

  10. #60
    Senior Member pointerDixie214's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rrbgtt View Post
    He described the way it is at my house also. I have changed maybe 3 diapers in my life with 4 children. Rhonda even mowed the grass when the kids were still too young to do it. I went to work and came home to supper on the table, my house and clothes cleaned. It has worked for us for over 20 years. Rhonda and I were both raised this way and we also think it's the right way.

    With 4 kids, Rhonda couldn't make enough to cover the daycare; much less the clothes, transportation costs, meals, etc.

    I do agree that there are always circumstances that can cause you to have to do things differently.
    Like I said, nothing wrong with it at all and no disrespect meant. I just couldn't do it is all.
    "Her beauty radiated like a beacon from a lighthouse!" - Buddy McCoy

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